Sunny Skies. Shady People.

I sit down at my computer 5 minutes ago and the first thing I see is that He@th Ledger was found dead this afternoon.

What the fuck is going on? Especially considering that a couple days ago, Br@d Renfro died (saw that one coming though; what with the heroin addiction and all).

I mean these are young people. These are people my age. I know a couple entries ago I was worried about being at a stalemate, but I don't really want to have to think at mortality at 26. I guess it is things like this that make you want to really think about re-evaluating your life.

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Last week, I didn't sleep well at all. I had this problem where my brain would not shut off. I just kept thinking about things and calculating things and rethinking things and recalculating things. And I just couldn't make it stop. I even tried to meditate and it wouldn't work. Now, I have had this problem before, but it usually happens every once in a while, every couple months. But last week, it started Tuesday night and happened every night till Saturday. Actually, I didn't even make it back home Saturday night (out with coworkers - having a game night), that is until 5:30 Sunday morning (OK, I was with coworkers until 3 and then I met up with a couple friends on the Beach and danced for the last 2 hours). But that worked, because I slept straight through till 11 am. Anyway, I was so exhausted during our low ropes course on Friday, and even worse when I went to work for a few hours on Saturday.

The same thing happened again last night, but I was actually able to get about 3 to 4 hours of sleep, so that was nice. Tonight, though, I decided to pick up a little secret weapon.

Red Wine. Half a glass of that shit knocks me out. So I'm having a glass, maybe 1.5, with dinner. I'm feeling a bit drowsy already and I'm not even done with the first one yet. Hopefully the sleep will be restfull. I need it.